What My Toddler is Teaching Me About Patience and Presence

The toddler stage is not for the weak. She breaks down, I break down, and then we have a snack—all within the first 15 minutes of being awake. Sound familiar? Parenting a toddler is like riding an emotional rollercoaster where the height requirements don’t apply, and the ride operator is an unpredictable two-year-old. But as much as it’s my job to guide her, I’ve realized it’s her job to slow me down.

Lesson 1: The World Won’t End If We Stop and Smell the Roses (or Stare at a Rock for 10 Minutes)

Before I became a mom, I prided myself on efficiency. Quick errands, fast meals, and a packed schedule were my norm. Then my toddler came along, and suddenly, a trip to the grocery store turned into an hour-long adventure in the parking lot, where every leaf and bug demanded our undivided attention.

At first, I fought it. I tried to rush her along. But then, I started noticing something, she was fully present in every moment. That tiny ant crossing the sidewalk was fascinating to her. The way the sunlight danced on the pavement? Magical. She wasn’t just dawdling; she was experiencing the world in a way I had long forgotten how to.

She’s teaching me that it’s okay to slow down. Not every moment has to be productive. Sometimes, the best moments are the ones where we simply exist together.

Lesson 2: Patience is a Muscle, and Mine Needed a Workout

Toddlers are the ultimate test of patience. Their favorite word is “no,” they take 30 minutes to put on socks, and they change their food preferences more often than I change my mind about what’s for dinner.

I used to think I was a patient person. But nothing humbles you faster than trying to get a toddler into a car seat when they suddenly decide they’re morally opposed to sitting.

I’ve learned that patience isn’t just about waiting, it’s about how I wait. Am I meeting her with frustration, or am I taking a deep breath and finding humor in the chaos? Some days, I do better than others. But I’ve realized that the more I practice patience with her, the more she learns how to regulate her own emotions.

Lesson 3: Laughter is the Best Reset Button

Tantrums are inevitable. Sometimes they’re over something understandable, like being overtired. Other times, they’re because I dared to break her granola bar in half, or gave her the wrong pink cup.

But one of the greatest tricks I’ve learned? Laughter. When we’re both on the verge of a meltdown, I try to find something, anything, to make her giggle. A silly face, a ridiculous dance, or an exaggerated gasp of horror when she “sneaks” a bite of my snack.

More often than not, it works. The tension breaks, and suddenly, we’re both laughing instead of crying. And even if it doesn’t work, at least I tried.

Lesson 4: The Smallest Moments Matter the Most

It’s easy to get caught up in the big milestones, first words, first steps, first time sleeping through the night (bless). But what I’ve come to treasure the most are the in-between moments.

The way she reaches for my hand when she’s unsure. The way she lights up when I sit on the floor and play with her. The way she snuggles into my shoulder after a long day.

These tiny moments, the ones that don’t get recorded in a baby book, are the ones that make up the heart of motherhood.

Lesson 5: Letting Go of Perfection is the Best Gift I Can Give Us Both

I had a lot of ideas about the kind of mom I would be. My house would be tidy, meals would be home-cooked and organic, and I would never, ever rely on screen time. Then reality hit. Some days, survival looks like a messy living room, chicken nuggets, and an episode of Bluey so I can eat my dinner while it’s still warm. And you know what? That’s okay.

My toddler isn’t looking for a perfect mom, she’s looking for me. A mom who loves her, who shows up, who tries her best. Some days, that means craft projects and homemade snacks. Other days, it means pajamas all day and ordering takeout.

The lesson? Letting go of perfection isn’t just freeing for me, it’s teaching her that it’s okay to be human.

Wrapping It Up: The Joy in the Chaos

Parenting a toddler is exhausting, hilarious, frustrating, and beautiful all at once. She challenges me, tests me, and pushes me to grow in ways I never expected.

But more than anything, she reminds me to be present. To slow down. To embrace the chaos and find joy in the small moments.

And when all else fails? We have a snack.