The Emotional Side of Financial Goals: Why Paying Off Debt Feels So Personal
Money is emotional. It’s more than just numbers on a spreadsheet or balances in an account, it’s tied to our security, our dreams, and even our self-worth. For my husband Carlos and me, tackling our debt has been one of the most challenging journeys we’ve faced together. It has forced us to confront our habits, our fears, and, most importantly, our hopes for the future.
Facing the Reality of Debt
When we first met with our financial advisor, Lisa Ward, in 2022, we were drowning in student loans, carrying credit card debt, and had no real grip on our monthly expenses. I vividly remember the anxiety leading up to that first meeting. Letting someone into that deeply personal (and honestly, messy) part of our lives was terrifying.
For a long time, I preferred to avoid thinking about our debt. It felt easier to just make minimum payments and pretend like it wasn’t weighing on us. But deep down, I knew that wasn’t sustainable. We wanted to build a future for our family, and ignoring our financial reality wasn’t going to get us there.
The Power of Having a Plan
Sitting down with Lisa changed everything. She didn’t just lay out a spreadsheet and tell us what we should do, she helped us create a plan that felt doable and, most importantly, aligned with our long-term goals. For the first time, we had a clear path forward. Even though it was daunting, it was also incredibly empowering.
One of the biggest takeaways from that first meeting was understanding where our money was actually going. We had never truly analyzed our spending before, and seeing the breakdown was eye-opening. It wasn’t about judgment or shame; it was about awareness.
The Emotional Rollercoaster of Paying Off Debt
Anyone who has embarked on a debt-free journey knows that it’s not just about numbers, it’s about mindset. There have been moments of victory, like paying off a credit card balance or putting extra money toward our student loans. But there have also been moments of frustration when progress feels slow or when unexpected expenses pop up.
And then there’s the FOMO. I won’t lie, when I see friends planning vacations or making big purchases, I sometimes feel that twinge of jealousy. I’d love to be traveling more, upgrading our home, or splurging on little luxuries without a second thought. But then I remind myself why we’re doing this. Every intentional financial decision we make now is setting us up for a future of financial freedom and security.
Accountability Makes All the Difference
One of the best things we did was bring in an outside perspective. Having Lisa as our financial advisor has been a game-changer. She’s not just there to crunch numbers, she’s there to remind us of our goals when we get off track, to help us navigate the best ways to tackle unexpected expenses, to celebrate our wins, and, yes, to be the voice in my head every time I go to swipe my card.
I am not sure I will ever be someone who enjoys budgeting, but there’s something incredibly freeing about knowing exactly where our money is going. It gives us control over our future, rather than feeling like our finances are controlling us.
Small Wins Add Up
We still have student loans; there’s no sugarcoating that. But we are actively working toward paying them off. Every extra payment and every financial decision that prioritizes our future over instant gratification is a step in the right direction. Do we backslide or have an off month? ABSOLUTELY!
We’ve also learned to celebrate the small wins along the way. Whether it’s sticking to our monthly budget, reaching a savings milestone, or resisting an impulse purchase, these victories reinforce that we are making progress, even when it doesn’t always feel like it.
Looking Toward the Future
Financial freedom isn’t just about eliminating debt, it’s about creating the life we want for our family. That vision is what keeps us going. The ability to travel without stress, to invest in experiences for our kids, to retire comfortably, all of that is worth the sacrifices we’re making now.
So, is it fun to confront our debt when I’d rather be booking a vacation? No. But am I grateful that we are working toward a plan that will ultimately give us the life we want? Absolutely.
If you’re in the middle of your own financial journey, know that you’re not alone. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or even discouraged at times. But don’t let those feelings stop you from taking action. Small steps add up, and every bit of progress matters.
And if you don’t already have someone to help hold you accountable, consider finding a financial advisor or even a trusted friend to support you along the way. Because while money is personal, you don’t have to navigate it alone.