30 Going on 20: Embracing the Chaos of Feeling Inexperienced in a Social Media World
Turning 30 is often hailed as a milestone, the big 3-0, the age where you’re supposed to have it all figured out. A stable career, a loving family, a Pinterest-worthy home, and a perfectly balanced life. But if we’re being honest, how many of us wake up, roll out of bed, and feel like we’re still navigating life as that awkward 20-something? Spoiler alert: it’s a lot of us.
I’m 30 in reality, but sometimes I feel like I’m playing dress-up in adulthood. There are days when I nail the mom-life hustle, crush it at work, or pull off a killer dinner recipe, and then there are days I stare at my to-do list like it’s written in a foreign language. If you’re in the same boat, welcome to the club! Let’s dive into the messy, beautiful paradox of being 30 but feeling 20 — all while navigating the endless comparisons that come with living in the age of social media.
The Social Media Highlight Reel
Social media has a sneaky way of making us feel like we’re falling behind. You scroll through Instagram, and there’s your former classmate launching a six-figure business, your old coworker buying their second vacation home, or that influencer with the glowing skin who seems to have unlocked the secret to eternal youth. Meanwhile, you’re celebrating the fact that you remembered to take the laundry out of the washer before it started to smell weird.
It’s so easy to compare your day-to-day grind to someone else’s curated highlight reel. But here’s the thing: what you see on social media is just that — highlights. It’s not the full story. It’s not the sleepless nights, the doubts, the messy in-between moments that everyone experiences but rarely shares. Even the people who look like they’ve got it all together have their own struggles. Remember, comparison is the thief of joy, and your journey is uniquely yours.
Celebrating Others Without Downplaying Yourself
How many times have you cheered for someone else’s accomplishments while downplaying your own? Maybe your best friend got a promotion, and you were genuinely thrilled for them, but instead of celebrating your own wins, you thought, “Why am I not there yet?” Or perhaps someone complimented you on a recent achievement, and you brushed it off, saying, “Oh, it’s not a big deal.”
Here’s the truth: your achievements matter. Big or small, every step forward is worth celebrating. The ability to cheer for others is a beautiful thing, but don’t let it come at the expense of recognizing your own growth. You are doing amazing things — even if those things sometimes feel ordinary or less glamorous. The fact that you’re showing up, trying, and growing is worth all the applause.
Everyone Starts Somewhere
“Anyone who ever did anything always had to do it for the first time once.” Read that again. The most successful people you admire didn’t wake up one day and suddenly have all the answers. They started somewhere. They stumbled, made mistakes, and figured things out along the way.
Think about it: the CEO giving keynote speeches once had their first nerve-wracking pitch meeting. The fitness coach with a million followers once struggled to hold a plank for 30 seconds. The best parents in the world once had a panic attack trying to figure out how to install a car seat. You don’t need to have all the answers right now. The journey is the point, and it’s okay to feel like a beginner. Beginners have the most room to grow, and every misstep is just another step forward.
Embracing the 30-Year-Old You (Who Still Feels 20)
Let’s talk about what it means to embrace this duality of being 30 but still feeling 20. It’s not about pretending to have it all together or denying the challenges that come with this stage of life. Instead, it’s about leaning into the messiness and realizing that feeling “inexperienced” doesn’t mean you’re failing.
Here are a few ways to keep it real and embrace the beauty of being a work-in-progress:
- Focus on Growth, Not Perfection: Life isn’t a checklist (something I CONSTANTLY have to remind myself). You’re not falling behind because your timeline doesn’t match someone else’s. Focus on growing into the best version of yourself, one day at a time.
- Celebrate Small Wins: Did you finally tackle that daunting project at work? Celebrate. Did you manage to drink enough water today? Celebrate. Life is full of tiny victories that deserve recognition.
- Surround Yourself with Authentic People: Find people who lift you up and remind you that it’s okay to be human. Authentic relationships will help ground you when social media comparisons creep in.
- Give Yourself Grace: Some days, you’ll crush it. Other days, you’ll binge-watch Netflix and eat cereal for dinner. Both days are valid, and both are part of the journey.
Turning Comparison Into Inspiration
Instead of letting social media comparisons drag you down, try flipping the script. Use those posts as inspiration instead of a measuring stick. See someone’s travel photos? Add a destination to your bucket list. Watch someone share their career success? Let it motivate you to take a step toward your own goals. By reframing comparison as inspiration, you can turn envy into action.
You’re Doing Better Than You Think
If you’ve made it this far, let this be your reminder: you’re doing better than you think. You’re navigating life with its twists, turns, and unexpected detours, and you’re still standing. That’s worth celebrating.
It’s okay to feel like a 20-year-old trapped in a 30-year-old’s body. It’s okay to question whether you’re doing this whole adulthood thing right. What’s not okay is letting self-doubt overshadow your progress. You are enough, exactly as you are.
So the next time you’re scrolling through social media and feeling less-than, remember this: you’re not alone. We’re all just trying to figure it out, one day at a time. Celebrate your wins, embrace your journey, and never forget that you’re capable of amazing things — even if you’re still figuring out where to start.
Now, go forth and own your beautifully imperfect, wonderfully chaotic, 30-going-on-20 life. You’ve got this!